Bees in My Bonnet: Monday Night Mash-Up

Bee in the Lavender


In case you haven’t heard Timothy Kurek pretended to be gay for a year and then wrote a book about his experience.

A grad student at George Washington University has been studying how gay and bisexual men experience street harassment.

An Open Letter to New Mama Me.  A parent looks back through her journey as a mom and writes a letter to her younger self.

Apologizing: polite, annoying or … unnecessary?  Women apologize a lot and why they need to stop.

Why hearing, “but you have it so good” is incredibly unhelpful and devalues someones story.

Abortion, rape, fat shaming, and eating disorders, can we all just stop saying terrible things to each other and start listening to our own bodies?

Canbebitter celebrates her one year anniversary and recognizes that we still have a long way to go.

Somehow Republicans are still managing to hold up the Violence Against Women Act, even though when it first passed in ’94 support was near unanimous.

Patriarchy from the perspective of a black woman and why white feminists need to pay attention.

50 Actual Facts About Rape.

Jessica Valenti writes how to end rape illiteracy at The Nation.

A fantastic definition of Patriarchy.

Why telling your children not to talk to strangers is a bad idea.  A mom talks about other great ways to teach your children to stay safe.

The United Nations declares access to contraception a “Universal Human Right.”

Rachel Held Evans talks about the dangers of labeling behaviors as “Biblical,” and using the Bible as a weapon.

A school in Utah pulls a children’s book off of library shelves because it portrays the homosexual lifestyle as fun and normal.

This article went viral a while ago but if case you haven’t read it the author describes how she lost faith in the “Pro-Life” movement and how she discovered it wasn’t about being pro-life at all.

And just for fun, 10 things to make you happier in your home.

What have you been reading?


4 thoughts on “Bees in My Bonnet: Monday Night Mash-Up

  1. benstupples says:

    Great post! I have just spent the last twenty minutes looking through all the links – apart from the one to my own site, of course! What, out of interest, is your opinion on patriarchy? It is a subject about which I am passionate, perhaps because I am a part of its culture, and I would be very interested to know your thoughts.

    • As a sociologist, and a woman, I am a firm believer in Patriarchy. I see it and experience it almost on a daily basis. Men hold a disproportionate amount of the power in our society. I do not say this in a hateful way, though watching it play out is frustrating. Men are privileged, this we know, and yet at the same time most men do not necessarily directly experience the benefits/effects of this privilege. As a sociologist I recognize this but that will not stop me from speaking out against the social systems that teach us that male is equal to good and strong, while female is equal to weak and not as good, sometimes even bad. It places both men and women in rigid boxes. I hope that makes sense.

      What are your thoughts?

      • benstupples says:

        Some people suggest a patriarchal system does not exist anymore in modern society: it does. I agree with you: men probably do hold a disproportionate amount of power in society. However, efforts are being made, by both men and women, to combat this inequality. In the company at which I am currently working, for instance, I know that if the board has to decide between two evenly-matched candidates – one female; the other male – they would choose the former. It is a program that has been introduced into many workplaces, an environment where the patriarchal system is being slowly broken down, called ‘Positive Action’. Some feminists might criticize such a policy, describing it as ‘disingenuous’ or ‘fake’ (and thus still enforcing a patriarchal system) because the women is simply being chosen because of her sex, not because of her personal attributes. However, one must remember that Positive Action is only used when candidates are like-for-like. Consequently, such a policy empowers the female sex, repressing the patriarchal system as a result. It is, I know, just a start – but I think it is a good one.

        One thing that frustrates me slightly is how some feminists, or simply women who criticize the patriarchal system, assume that all men, regardless of whether they are aware of it nor not, advocate a patriarchal system. Such an attitude is wrong. I do not advocate a patriarchal system, though I may have done as a teenager, and, as I continue to mature, I strongly doubt I will in the future. Not all men enjoy or exploit the advantages a patriarchy grants them either – on the contrary. It causes men to compete against one another constantly; it makes men insecure almost every aspect of their appearance, something women themselves are certainly effected by; and it causes those who do not abide by its unwritten rules to be outcasted, to be ridiculed. Though it may sound like I have been, I have never been treated in such a way by my male peers. Luckily – well, luckily or unluckily, depending on one’s perspective – my sporting abilities have protected me from being completely rejected by the patriarchal system. However, now that I do not play so much sport anymore, I see how petty it all is, how it is all one incessant game of hiding one’s innermost feelings. I am fighting the patriarchal system from within – well, I am trying to – and it is tough. In fact, it can be downright depressing at times. Like a great oak tree, the patriarchal system is so deeply and firmly embedded into modern society that you can barely see its roots.

        Incidentally, I am currently writing an article about how the patriarchal system effects young males. When I am finished, would you like to read it?


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